EP #1. Introducing My New Podcast: The Fountain with Ellie Thomas

I have a really exciting announcement today - a project I have been playing with since mid-march is finally ready to be shared with you!

After 5 months of listening, exploring, advancing, and then retracting and refining until it felt more clear, The Fountain with Ellie Thomas Podcast is LIVE 🎉🎧✨.

The Becoming of The Fountain began months ago…

When I let go of the Deeply Nourished For Life podcast and took it off air in early 2021, I had no idea if another show would emerge with time or not.  Now, 2.5 years later, many of the elements that I originally engaged as part of my work with Deeply Nourished for Life and The Well Together Collective have re-emerged, asking to be shared, explored, and offered with the energy that now flows through me.

While it doesn't seem that surprising in hindsight, each time it happens feels pretty wild – like an old, long-lost friend arriving at my door after years of being out of touch, yet knowing the love has never faltered. There is catching up to do, new expression available on both ends, lots of questions and reflections to be entertained, and eagerness to get to know each other as we are now and see what can become of our re-union.

This new podcast first tapped me on the shoulder in early March of this year.  I had just taught a class on Sacred Grief, where I shared pieces of my walk with grief and its transformative nature in my life.  While I unconsciously knew there was exponential wisdom ready to be shared through me, it wasn't until the class finished that I had a clearer glimpse of just how much, and how eagerly it wanted be let out.

I believe that once embodied, wisdom and teachings don't need to be spoken to be shared and of service - our simple beingness can bestow them.  However,  as the internal treasure chest opened that day, I saw that each jewel would only multiply and take its fullest shape and form when I offered them to an external home – a place where those hungry could arrive, receive, connect and interact with the energy of the learnings, and then make them their own.  

As I played with the creation of a new podcast, at first I thought the show was meant to be purely grief focused. But as I began to record episodes on the topic, it didn't feel quite right.  Something felt flat, and while grief is never one dimensional (in my experience), focusing solely on it was too limited for what was in flow for this podcast. 

Over the past month, as I let go more fully of my original understanding, The Fountain appeared.  I chuckled to myself when it landed so clearly. Grief, and grief as transformational force in life, is a prominent part of my fountain and it will be part of the podcast flow, but it is just one piece of the whole and there is so much more ready to spill out.

ALL OF ME, ALL OF LIFE, AND ALL OF YOU WANTED TO BE WELCOMED INTO THIS NEW EXPERIENCE. 

As I say in the intro:

"This show is a place where we connect with our multi-dimensionality. With the Life, the living water flowing within us, through mind, body, Spirit, heart, and All. This show is a place where we explore it all, where we tap into wisdom that has surfaced through pain and joy, and the fullness of our journeys. This podcast is a place to come and remember, to sink back into, the living water that flows within you, and to be guided back to your fountain, your fullness, your wholeness."

I am so excited to birth this new space and share it with you. It feels out there in the perfect Ellie way, and aligned with my heart and fullness. I hope it brings you into your heart and fullness instantly as you listen and take it in.

I would love to hear what arises for you as you listen, and anything specific you'd like to hear more about on the show. 

I'd also be immensely grateful it you take a moment to share the show with someone that comes to heart or mind, and rate and review the it on your favorite listening platform!

P.S. This spring I also received the intuitive message that many of us that are meant to share our voices in a new wave of podcasting are feeling the tug on our hearts, or taps on our shoulders. If this is you, may this be encouragement to you to take your next step in the exploration.

Being with Yourself (+ Free Meditation)

A few weeks ago, shortly after revealing Ellie•Flow, I found myself going through all of the meditations I have created over the last few years on my computer.  There are A LOT of them, so I pressed play on each one, listening to the tone of my voice and the connection of heart and mind carried through in every practice. 

I found some I had forgotten about and still really love - meditations that still ‘hold up’ – a loving and powerful energetic invitation is felt from the moment I press play.  Others I enjoyed finding and listening to again because they felt a little less energetically full, which allowed me to, yet again, reflect on how much I have deepened, evolved, and grown in my connection, gifts, and leadership over the past few years.

Within seconds of pressing play on each meditation, I could feel the energy I had created it from. Sifting through each recording reminded me of every stage of the few years. I remembered weeks where I made things happen through ‘push and force’ energy and sheer determination to not give up. I remembered weeks where my heart had been peeled (or cracked) open on yet another layer. I remembered that through that pain, I had opened, connected with myself and beyond, and felt feelings deeper than I had ever allowed myself to feel. I remembered how from that soft and vulnerable inner place something beautiful was always born, no matter how tiny it felt in the moment.  In the tone and frequency of my voice and words, I remembered it all.

Maybe about 10 meditations in to my memory lane listening exhibition , I came across a 6 minute audio titled “Being with Yourself”.  The title alone surprised me, as the practice of being with myself is so integrated into who I am today that I don't really need to consciously think those words anymore.  But it wasn’t always this way, and simply seeing this title brought the memories of all of the years I didn't know how to be with myself; all of the years I disconnected, distracted, denied what felt true within me, rushed to the forefront of my mind. This title brought back the hundreds of times that the simple practice of reconnecting with myself - layer after layer - felt hard and heavy with resistance.

Yet with intention, desire, and deep deep KNOWING that there was more to live, I returned.

Layer by layer, I practiced inviting in breath, inviting in sacred love and attention to each part of my being. I practiced inviting in willingness, to come back to feeling and wholeness when I felt myself hardening from fear, anger, grief, pain, or uncertainty.

From the moment I found the practice on my computer, before I even pressed play, I felt excited to share it with you. What a gift it would have been to past me to have a 6-minute practice I could turn to every day, no matter how or where I found myself. Something so minimal, just to help get the ball rolling in the direction of reconnection when everything felt hard and empty.

A simple and accessible offering and invitation to re-arrive in your body, in your Self - to come home, over-and-over again. 

I of course needed to listen to it again before sharing. So, I pressed play and heard this stream of consciousness intro: 

"The theme of this week’s meditation is ‘Being with Yourself’. Often when we are in times of stress, chaos, or feeling unsafe or having lots of uncertainty, we look for things outside of ourselves to sooth and calm ourself, instead of simply being present with what’s going on with in us, with our feelings , and with what’s coming up. So making a small space for yourself everyday to literally sit in silence, in love with yourself, to hear yourself, and to be willing to allow what desires to surface, to surface so you can be relieved of it, is a powerful daily practice. And this will be a light way to do this for 5 minutes at a time, and lead you into it. Know you are not alone, I am holding space with you, I am here with you breathing along side you, and you do not need to journey through any of what you are walking through alone."

There is a lot coursing in us and around us right now, and I believe that taking moments to be with yourself, with the fullness of all you are and feel, has never been so important.

The art of being with ourselves isn't just for hard moments - it is powerful and important to fully be with all of our joy, delight, fun, play, and beyond too - but learning to open to the hard moments and pain is where the depth of my transformative walk began, and I know that may be true for others as well.

If this practice calls to you, if a guided 6-minute practice would feel like a supportive gift, then I invite you to press play and begin now:

(Please Note: this practice intentionally does not have any music to help guide you into a place of stillness and presence with the totally of your being)

Soon I will have multiple longer meditations and recorded practices (options with and without background music) up for sale on my website, to be purchased individually or as a bundle.  Keep your eyes peeled if that is your sort of thing!

I will leave you with this: 

I like to imagine a planet where everyone simply had or created 6-minutes of space to be with themselves before heading out into the world.  I like to imagine how different things would be if we knew how to hold ourselves, to let ourselves FEEL and connect before we act. If we individually and collectively knew how to feel the pulse of our own energy moving through our bodies and beings - if we felt clarity on what isn't really ours and how to release it with love to reconnect with the truth of who we are.

I am holding a vision for that world, for all the possibilities alive there, for all of us. May it begin now with 6 loving minutes of opening today.

If you are ready to dive deeper, I would love to welcome you into a coaching session. Learn more and book here.

I don’t simply want to be alive, I want to LIVE.

I have been led on a sacred path of opening to the daily unfolding of life, of connecting to the essence of life and engaging with it a little bit more fully each day, for many years now.

My pain led me to the water of living. More specifically, my pain carried me to a point of  internal collapse in 2018 where I found myself saying “I can’t live like this anymore”, over and over again. 

Despite my deepest fears, in order to consciously choose life, I had no other option but to open to my pain – to open my arms to it, and embrace it fully for the first time ever. I could no longer run from it, block it, push it down. If I wanted to live fully, which I did (even though I didn’t really know what that meant or felt like), I no longer had room in my being to ignore it. 

I turned toward my pain with fear at first, afraid of what it would do to me. But the irony is that when I actually found the right support, and allowed myself to look at it and hold it with love, I began to see it with beauty and tenderness that not only allowed healing, it also began to transform my way of life.

I kept this journey private on many levels for many years, marveling at the possibilities of reaching new states of living as I encountered or approached them time and time again. Over time, I’m sure the magic of this process started to bubble up and spill out out of my Ellie fountain. Others around me observed and felt shifts they couldn’t pinpoint, and I couldn’t quite find the words to share fully yet. 

leaning into the shifts in being

Even when the days and weeks felt dense, each month offered new teachings. The deeper and deeper I dove inward, following the calling of the Spring of Life, the deeper I could breathe.

I felt clear and open, connected to an energy inside that I learned I could tap into any moment, knowing my heart and God within was all right there. The feeling was was indescribable – an undeniable energy of being and becoming led me forward with hope, to an empowered passion to guide others to the possibilities of living, even though I still had so much to walk on my own (and perhaps always will).

I thought, “Oh the possibilities for the world if everyone had space to feel their version of this inside of them.”

It was beyond wholeness; it was living wholeness.

Perhaps it was meant to be a private journey until now, until I could process, understand, and hold it on new levels. Until I could truly embody and dance with the powerful platter of sweetness, rawness, pain, joy, peace, divinity and humanness all combined into each moment. 

I am still being initiated into new layers and levels of living everyday, and even though I need moments of pause to play and rejuvenate along the way, I hope it never ends. 

I’ve dreamed for years of sharing this process. This week I found a special reminder I had written on a sticky note at a business retreat in 2018. While doing a meditation around connecting with our businesses and selves, I tapped into a vision of what my spirit felt like and desired for the first time; I saw myself dancing down an empty street and as I passed the houses, people started flooding out, joining me and welcoming more and more people to join us as we grooved forward together.

Afterwards I wrote: “Spirit: A leader, dancing through the street, having fun, inviting + encouraging others. Leading the way.”

I was years from connecting with Ellie Flow, still very much at in the infancy of my own process, just arriving to the point of collapse I referenced above. And yet the energy that I aim for Ellie Flow to hold was already alive inside of me: an inviting place for encouragement, expression of the soul, and dancing through life together.

There is so much alive inside of you, I promise. Maybe it’s ready to pour out now, or maybe your soul is ready to leave you a clue for later - for the perfect future moment when you will be fully ready for it.

If you feel called, book your first session and let’s tap in, explore, and dance forward together.