The Power of Deep Coaching + walking a path of committed limitless becoming and transformation

This was originally written on July 14th, 2022

It’s been an intense last few days of all of the feels (I see you full moon) - grief, resisting my grief, self doubt and criticism, blah-ness, tears and more tears, fear, irritation… - feeling the overwhelm of it all, releasing each piece and part as I am ready, and then opening to and allowing the energetic shift that is ready to unfold.

This week has been a practice of recognizing new layers of my deep and long-lived survival patterns and being able to finally observe them from a new lens and energy - instead of reacting our of a survival loop, finding more peace in simply holding and being with the reactivity this patterns stir up in my mind and body. I am immensely encouraged by this, as this feels like a ground for healing on this new layer and level.

And as I always do, I have landed in a place of clarity and open heartedness once again. A place from which I can my make clear, aligned decisions and offer myself grace, permission, and immense love and compassion once again.

From achievement orientation to process orientation

You see, walking a path of committed limitless becoming and transformation, and meeting and guiding others on their version of that path, does not release anyone from the human experience and the healing available in fully embracing it. Quite the opposite actually. Personally, in many ways I feel it intensifies the journey, reconfirming over and over again that I am willing to walk through my darkest valleys, no matter how short or long, to reconnect with my light. That I am willing to stand in the fire, lay down and surrender, open and receive, over and over again. Each time on a new layer, a new level. 

Part of the reason I love what I do is that is challenges the status quo on growth, personal development and coaching as the world knows it currently. 

We are conditioned to focus purely on the achievements, measuring ourselves and others against what is and isn’t accomplished, but when that is all we focus on, we are missing so much of the magic of life! The truth is that there is no “there”, no “arrival” on this path. We may reach new levels and states, but there is no end to all we can grow into and become.

The theme of moving from "doing-ness" to "being-ness" is something I explore a lot with my clients, and as that transition happens, we naturally begin to move from what I like to call moving from "achievement orientation to process orientation".

When we open and shift into process orientation, we can take in and allow all of the gifts that bloom along that path, instead of being so tunnel vision focused on the outcome. In my experience, it truly opens us to life fully and there is magic and beauty even in the really challenging and trying times.

The Energetic Shift

As I have worked with this transition in my own life in the past 4 years, one of the most powerful shifts I have observed is that the way I interact with myself and life is SO DIFFERENT than it used to be, and because of this, I love being me. Even though there are of course hard days, I love who I am today. I love this version of me, this “open and here for it all” Ellie.

I see that in my clients everyday as well. Even when nothing is “figured out yet”, resolved, or clear - even when the relationship with someone is difficult or strained, even when uncertainty or grief hits harder than ever before, even when pain arises once again - the shift in being that Deep coaching and transformational work facilitates and supports truly opens us to a powerful relationship with all parts of ourselves, life, others, and beyond that is filled with possibility, with freedom, with energy, and with LOVE.

It facilitates an energetic shift that changes everything. How we feel with ourselves. How our inner life feels. How our body feels.  How our outer life feels. How our relationship to God feels, as well as our own humanness and divinity. Nothing goes untouched. 

One of my mentors of the last few years, Pilar Lesko, a woman the feels like a deeply connected soul friend, recently wrote in one of her beautiful newsletters, “Life doesn’t become ‘perfect’, absolved of difficulty, contrast, tension, mistakes, and pain. You do not get everything you think you want. But rather, you become more available to interact with life, as it is - and through that, meet the wise, sacred and meaning-filled energy that permeates each moment. You receive the lessons, transformation, and healing that’s available and reality consistently re-orients to that devotion. You naturally generate more authenticity, kindness, and generosity. You experience more peace, joy, play, flow, and clarity. Everything seems more beautiful.”

Those words ring so true and depict this never-ending experience of becoming and transformation so well. 

I often say to one of my friends, “As we expand into one part of ourselves, all parts of us expand - even when we can’t see it all yet.” Despite what we must walk through, the fullness and the beauty only multiplies if we are willing to make room for it.